Delayed Desire

by Chrissy

Age: 33
Race/ethnicity: White
Location: Michigan
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
Occupation: Human Services
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? Somewhat
Sexual orientation: Mostly heterosexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexual orientation/sexuality better/best? Heterosexual – open to some Bi experiences.
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? none

Delayed Desire

How long ago did this hookup happen? 4-5 years

How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? My partner was a guy a few years younger than me I worked with 10 years ago. We worked next to each other for almost 2 years. We were really good friends, worked well together and we always had a strong attraction. However, when we worked together he was engaged and I was living with my boyfriend.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We ran into each other at a community event and got to talking. Turns out we were both single and he asked me out. We went to a basketball game which was having $1 pints and I had a little too much to drink. When he took me home, we started kissing and it got extremely hot and heavy quickly. I know I did not plan to have sex with him that night, I had not even shaved my legs! I was on the pill and he had a condom with him. It was mutual instigation.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? Did you have an orgasm? Did your partner(s)? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? It was a very mutual experience, lots of foreplay, body touching, kissing – we both performed oral sex and we switched positions; all in all it was super hot and incredible. I had multiple orgasms and he had 2. He was a great lover and we did chat a little after. When it was time to go, he said he would call.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? Did you discuss STI history? We did not discuss but we did use condoms.

What were your REASONS for having this hookup? I was very sexually attracted to him.

Were alcohol or drugs involved? If so, how much? Alcohol. I had 3-4 beers.

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it? What are your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? It was such a great evening and I was really happy about the entire experience. The next day I felt a little let down, almost like when you have to come home from vacation. I had waited a long time to go out with him and it was incredible but then it was over. I was a little sad and empty the next day.

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? No one.

Was this a consensual and/or wanted experience for you? For your partner? Yes

Do you regret this hookup? If so, why? Yes. We talked a couple times after but he was very distant. I started feeling like he got what he wanted and he was done. I had wanted it too but maybe did not realize it would be a one-time thing.

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? How about the WORST? Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? It was hot sex but that is all it was – and that makes it feel a little empty. The worst was the feeling of being cast away…

It has made me avoid casual hook-ups or one night stands. I tend to date someone for a couple months before becoming sexually involved.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? A little positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Very negative

What did you think about this story? Tell us in the comments – just be nice!

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