First Time Through Tinder: I Didn’t Know What Netflix and Chill Really Meant



What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 20
What’s your race/ethnicity? Southeast Asian
What continent do you live on? Asia
Highest education received: Some college (currently in college)
What’s your occupation? Student
What’s your current relationship status? Single
How religious are you? A little
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 1
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

First Time Through Tinder: I Didn’t Know What Netflix and Chill Really Meant

How long ago did this hookup happen? A month ago

What was your relationship status at the time? Single

How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a month

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? We meet in Tinder. His profile didnt say much about him, only that one of his pictures was him playing the piano. He looked average, taller than me and he was extremely sweet when we first talked through the app. For weeks, he wanted to meet with me and watch movies but at that time, I couldn’t as I was on a family trip. He was nice, funny and cute. We didn’t talk about anything related to sex.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? When school started, we finally went on to watch a movie in my dorm room. At first we just talked casually. We had dinner and watched movies again. As the night went on, he started to place his hands on my lap and started stroking my thigh in a casual manner. We were watching a horror movie; I thought it was normal because we often got scared and grabbed each other, but whatever. I never though that that night, it would lead to sex. I was a virgin, and I didnt know what to do. He started kissing me and it went on from there.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? My first thought was, “This is happening, okay. I can do this.” I was nervous, I didn’t know what to do or feel. I though that I should be ecstatic but during the kissing and dry humping, I didn’t get any pleasure. I didn’t know that I would be able to not feel anything when he went down on me. A man getting down on me is the most awaited sexual things that I’ve always wanted to experience, so I was disappointed when I didn’t orgasm from it. We started dry humping each other and I just felt pain, maybe he was doing it wrong, maybe he was too horny to think about what I was feeling. I said, “no” when he started to take off my panties. I couldn’t, I didn’t want to lose my virginity that way. He went back to kissing me, and eventually, there came a time when I didn’t stop him from taking off my underwear and went on to performing oral sex. He kissed me in the right places, yes, but I didn’t feel much pleasure. He asked me if it was my first time, I lied and said no. His dick looked and felt amazing both with my hands and inside me but I also remember feeling pain. Just pain. He was gentleman enough to ask me if I still hurt, he took his time and waited for me to adjust. He asked me if I liked what he was doing, and I did. I didn’t cum but I was close. He started fingering me, and I started moaning until I came. He was okay. Or maybe he was careful around me too when he knew that I was a virgin. We had sex several times and each time, the pain lessened and the pleasure increased. We went at it until the morning with little intervals of sleep. I woke him up because he had class that day and he left not before fingering me and making me cum. He came back after his class and we had sex again.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? A little

Did you have an orgasm? I don’t know

Did your partner have an orgasm? I don’t know

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? We had sex for two days. I felt neutral until the day after, I felt insecure and cried. Because I never really though that my first time would be from a hookup. We sometimes text each other but not as often and as lively as our conversations before we hooked up. We often text and say that we miss each other but we were both too busy with school and never really found time to hang out again. Maybe after the exams, we’ll meet, I don’t know.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) None

What were your motives for this hookup? Hoping or expecting it would lead to something more, Making new friends, Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it, I didn’t want it but was unable to stop it

How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Not at all

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I didn’t give a clear ‘yes’, but I didn’t give a ‘no’

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Somewhat

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They didn’t give a clear ‘yes’, but didn’t give a ‘no’

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Mixed (Some positive, some negative)

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Somewhat

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure

Do you regret this hookup? A little bit

Why do you regret this hookup? Because I never thought that I would lose my virginity on a hookup. To a guy that I know so little about – I thought that it would go somewhere else. But we are friends now, we’re just too busy with school related shit.

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Finally kissed someone again after 4 years of not having a boyfriend haha.

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? No. But it’s okay.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Somewhat positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!