Hooking Up Casually & Finding a Bestie

by HarryM

What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 29
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? Europe
What country and/or city do you live in? Germany
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (eg., MA, MS, PhD, JD, MD)
What’s your occupation? Engineer
What’s your current relationship status? Dating casually
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 23
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 9

Hooking Up Casually & Finding a Bestie

How long ago did this hookup happen? May 2014

What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status

How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a month

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I met her over OkCupid. She was a 99% match and we texted for quite a while. She’s not the classic hotty, but in my perception has some sort of baroque beauty with an awesome body, as I found out. Curves, i mean by that. Her face was interesting, at first. After we ended our second meeting (and spending time togehter for hours), I still thought, I wouldn’t recognize her in a crowd. I like faces that get me thinking. It fits her personality, since she’S super smart and brings very diverse things in as a person, in all sorts of personality traits. She became one of my favourite people.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We texted a lot prior and met for mini golf and picnic (my date choice), then she invited me to a poetry slam contest. Amateur contest but still kind of funny and some stuff to talk about afterwards. We left the contest and kind of went into the direction of the station (where I would have to leave from), but her place as well (as I found out shortly after). At some point I just told her, I was gonna bring her to the door. At her door I asked her if she needed a “hand on something”, she burst out into laughter, gave me a high 5, we kissed and went to her bedroom right away.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We made out heavily and stripped each other down. I went down on her for quite a while and it turns out, she’s multiorgasmic. She came 2 times before I started fucking her missionay, really hard with her telling me to get harder and faster. We were both sweating as hell. She came again and told me, I was a damn maschine (things I like to hear). She took over and rode me heavily as I’ve never been ridden before, masturbating herself and cumming 2 more times. I asked her, if she was done, flipped her over and finished in a condom after heavy doggy style.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, one

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I slept over and she had to get to work the next morning. Since it was pretty warm in her appartement (right under the roof) we woke up early and fucked heavily again. She left (I was searching my first job after finishing my studies at the time), I made the dishes and left. This lead into a very comfortable FWB-Situation with a lot of sex. I asked her around June if she was in for more, but she declined so we continued having sex and fun togehter. I screwed things up in July with being an ass to some of her friends and crashing her birthday party. I can’t remeber anything, but she was in tears afterwards and needed some space. She then told me she was just before asking for a relationship. I was fucked up as hell at that time and it lead me to work on some alcohol issues I cleary had at that time.
We met again in September for a concert I bought her tickets as a gift for her birthday. She moved to another city by then, but her parents were away so we ended up at hers having sex. That lead to some more sex until early 2016 when she ended it, saying she wants to find something serious. We stayed in contact and telling each other how things are going. I think we’re both very open to one another. We skype 1-2 times a month since then, talking a lot and seeing each other occasionally. Last time we had sex was in July 2015. Last time I saw her was 3 weeks ago before she left for a job abroad. I slept over at hers but we agreed on not having sex. So we cuddled quite heavily.
I’m glad I met her, I’m glad we came from fwb to a friendship that seems pretty stable. I like to know about her and the fact that we decided to quit having fantastic sex doesn’t matter too much. Not sure what the future brings but for now, it’s all good.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Emotional intimacy, closeness, connection

How intoxicated were you? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it

What substances did you consume? Alcohol

How intoxicated was your partner? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it

What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Somewhat

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Somewhat

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? A couple of friends know about the situation. She’s met some of my friends, I’ve met some of her friends and had dinner with her parents a few times as well.

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? A little bit

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? A little bit

Do you regret this hookup? Not at all

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Having fantastic sex and fInding a very good friend

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? I screwed things up for leading into more.

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? It was my first real fwb situation and I really like the concept.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!