What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 30
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? Australia
What country and/or city do you live in? Melbourne
Highest education received: Some college (not currently in college)
What’s your occupation? Design
What’s your current relationship status? Single
Religious affiliation: Ambivalent
How religious are you? A little
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? Pleaser
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? ~30
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
How long ago did this hookup happen? 6
What was your relationship status at the time? Single
How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand
How long did you know the person before this hookup? Just met that day
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I met Ashley through an dating app. She was of 2nd generation African decent to Australia. She was a generally slender build with dread braided hair. Firm body. Her personality was a little unusual to me as she seemed to have a persona shrouding what was really going on but I went along with it. We got talking about meeting up for diner somewhere sometime, this was then twisted & changed several times by her until it ended up me picking her up and heading to a pub near her place in a half hour. I got ready and headed out to pick her up. We were pretty much the only ones there and it was close to closing, I was driving so I just had coke she just had lemonade. The conversation was irratic at best with her making comments about double entendres which seemed to be by accident. The few locals in the pub had started to raise an eye as there was a younger fella talking with a darker skinned girl which there weren’t many of in that part of the world. They were also looking at me to gauge my reaction to the slightly animated discussion she was having. She also meantioned she had a friend who was a sex worker of some sort whom was having relationship issues. This she touched on in different ways through the evening and I believe she was sending and recieving texts about it while we met.
She said she was studying pediactrics and was in the final stages of prepping for exams before she was going to have to move away. It did seem like a strange time to want to head out to meet someone on what I remember was a quiet Tuesday night or similar.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? Ashley decided she wanted to leave and on the way out suggested a movie. The local cinema wouldn’t be screening anything more that night so she then suggested my place. I had only moved into my house a day or two earlier and my soon to be housemate wasn’t yet moved in so it was a good time to entertain so I agreed and we went back. We sat on the couch and I put on a movie I hadn’t yet seen. It was running for all of about 15 seconds when she turned to me and said “are you going to kiss me?”
From that point, it was just on. Some absolutely luscious kisses from her and nails in the back of my head to lock me in suggested she wanted one thing only.
We got up and went to my room, I took off my shirt and she seemed nervous in some way. She didn’t seem keen to get undressed at all. I took it slow and crawled to the bed with her, we kissed some more and she seemed to be having an internal crisis to what she was doing but she still seemed horny.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? With the lights off we both ended up naked and eventually started to have sex. It was dark and I wasn’t making many noises, I then noticed the wind outside and heard the roof creak slightly, the weather was picking up. After a few moments, she said “I want to see you” so I reached over and flicked on the bedside light. I could now see a lanky black woman clearly under me with a coy look on her face, legs doing all sorts around me. I continued on top of her for a while until the request came “I want you to call me a whore and a slut”
I didn’t need too much more of an invitation at that point, I straightened myself, reached down to my sides grabbing her knees and positioning her calves around my neck. She locked her ankles behind my head and pulled me in a bit to which I got myself positioned and folded her right down, hands around her throat pile driving her asking “is that what you want whore? To be fucked like a slut hard?”
This went for a minute or two before I felt her legs push back at me slightly and her body tense, she had cum. She relaxed slightly and I continued until I came as well.
She positioned herself on me after in really strange ways and continued to check her phone and reference back to this friend she had and the pimp. I started to get a bit creeped out because at this stage the wind had picked up quite a bit and I couldn’t hear anything else outside. What I was noticing was the security light at the carport flicking on & off. It had dawned on me that this could have been a setup and someone (her pimp!) May have been outside. I got quite nervous about it in fact.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Somewhat
Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? She had wanted to go home and since I drove her I would have to drive her back. It wasn’t a long way but I thought it was best to go. She started to make references to her housemates probably wondering where she was. She had then started to say things about me staying with her there for the night which seemed a little odd. I had determined that it was only wind outside, no one else, but on this latest suggestion, my fear all came back that this was becoming some kind of setup (with or without the pimp). I think there could have been reference made vaguely on the drive back re her housemates meeting me and finding out about what she’d been doing. I took this to be part of some fantasy she had which I had now become part of. Other things were said which would imply to some part her wanting some kind of orgy with whoever was back at the house. We got back to hers and she reached over to start rubbing me through my shorts. I wasn’t having much of it, it was late, I was tired, fearful, not horny anymore. I said she had my number and should feel free to keep in touch
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Learning new things, experimenting, Thought it was an important experience to have, Everyone else was/is doing it, Boredom, Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it, It was easy / convenient, First time I’d been with someone of a different race before
How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How intoxicated was your partner? I don’t know
What substances did your partner(s) consume? Who knows!
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Somewhat
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I didn’t give a clear ‘yes’, but I didn’t give a ‘no’
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? I don’t know / I’m not sure
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? May have told a friend about the part being confused if it was a prostitute or a crazy mixed up woman I had slept with once
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Other
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? I got to Christen the new house
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Not knowing what the hell was going on
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? This one in particular probably cemented a lot of thoughts I had about it. It took a while to debrief myself after what happened. One thing I do look back on was the importance of her communicating with me. The actual intentions of the night were not made clear, the request to turn on the lights, the request to be called names other things she wanted were critical to the outcome for both of us. Once I knew what she wanted I was more than happy to do that for her. I still make quite some effort to find out what my partners want and how I can please them
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
Anything else you want to add about this hookup? Friends who I told this too all thought it was funny I thought I was going to get jumped by a pimp
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? If you find someone you like and think they are going to be up for it, don’t be shy. Spell it out for them if you need to what you’re after and what you really want them to do for you
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Interesting way to kill time
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