I Still Don’t Know Why It Happened But What’s Done Is Done.



What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 43
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? Indianapolis, USA
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
What’s your occupation? Structural engineer
What’s your current relationship status? Engaged/Married (monogamous)
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 15
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? none

I Still Don’t Know Why It Happened But What’s Done Is Done.

How long ago did this hookup happen? 10 months ago

What was your relationship status at the time? Dating casually

How would you best classify this hookup? Unexpected/One-night Stand

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a month

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I know her height is 4’11” and her measurements were 35/24/34 and I only know that because she mentioned it before. She had brown eyes, brown hair, and wore glasses. I only knew her for about 2 weeks. I’m not sure what my feelings about her were since she was mostly an acquaintance at that point.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? I started seeing an older lady casually for about three weeks when she invited me to her 24 year old daughter’s wedding. It took place at a large church and I didn’t really know anyone there, so while everyone was preparing I would walk around the halls. At some point, about 20 minutes before the ceremony, I walked past her daughter coming out of a restroom in her wedding dress. She asked what I thought about everything and we talked for a few. She seemed nervous and anxious and couldn’t stop smiling as a result. I mentioned how she had about 15 minutes left of being nervous when she asked if I ever do any “crazy spontaneous things” and I replied “on occasion” even though that would have been a question that I would have had to think about. She said she missed her chance to sow her oats and wanted one last fling with another guy to remember what it’s like before tying the knot. My first thought was “well that’s kinda f*** up,” but I just nodded my head and said, “everyone gets nervous before the actual ceremony,” to slightly divert the conversation. Her next words were more blunt. “I didn’t have the bachelorette party that I probably should have. So would you want to…with me real quick? I think it’ll help calm my nerves and I don’t know anyone else that might be as understanding.” I felt shocked and I didn’t realize that I was understanding either, but she apparently thought I was. However her attractiveness and question became overpowering and I told her, “sure”.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We slipped into a closet when no one else was in the hallway. It was small and had a pile of chairs stacked. There was barely enough room for us to shut the door. I pulled a chair off top of the stack and sat it down, still unsure of what, and how we were going to go about this. The only light into this closet emanated from the door seams as my eyes slowly adjusted to the darkness. “Just don’t mess up my makeup or hair,” she whispered as she helped undo my pants in the dark. I could feel the fluff of her wedding gown drape over me as she straddled me. I wasn’t hard just yet, so she rubbed her pussy on my dick and I thought at first that her panties were still on until I gradually felt some moisture and realized she wasn’t wearing any. I groped her body and when I got hard, she raised up and used her hand to get my head inside her, then she let go and dropped her weight down on me which made it hurt a little bit going in. She threw her arms around my shoulders and started riding me slowly, then she quickly worked up the pace until she was pounding hard on my dick while we both breathed heavily, trying to hold in our moans. My eyes had adjusted that I could just make her out in the darkness. I grabbed onto her waist and held on for the ride.

Within a couple of minutes I told her, “okay i’m about to cum,” she gasped loudly in my ear, “me too,” and kept riding me hard as she gripped her finger nails into my back. I had assumed that I would pull out or that she would at least want me to, but in the midst of our orgasms she didn’t want to stop and I couldn’t hold it in any longer and had to let it go inside her. She gradually slowed down to a stop and we gathered our bearings. She stood up and whispered “I can feel it running down my leg. I don’t want to get it on my dress” So realizing we were short sighted in not having anything to wipe off with I pulled up my pants and took off one of my socks and handed it to her so that she could wipe off. She handed it back to me and that sock just felt completely slimed, but I could do nothing else with it other than to put it in my pocket. We peeked out of the door and quickly stepped out. We checked each other out to make sure we were in order and she just told me “thanks,” and headed back to her dressing room. I had to commence for the next several hours with just one sock on.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, one

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I continued seeing her mom and we started dating more seriously to this very day. Her daughter and I never spoke about the incident ever since.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) None

What were your motives for this hookup? Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it

How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? I don’t know / I’m not sure

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I didn’t give a clear ‘yes’, but I didn’t give a ‘no’

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? I don’t know / I’m not sure

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I never told anyone.

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? I didn’t tell anyone

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure

Do you regret this hookup? Not at all

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Forbidden sex

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Forbidden sex

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? I don’t think so

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative

Anything else you want to add about this hookup? No

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? Not sure

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Interesting.

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!