My First (And Only) Experience

by Emma Brown

What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 18
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? US
Highest education received: Some college (currently in college)
What’s your current relationship status? Dating casually
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? Very
What’s your sexual orientation? Mostly heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 1
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

My First (And Only) Experience

How long ago did this hookup happen? 2 nights sgo

What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status

How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand

How long did you know the person before this hookup? Just met that day

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? My partner and I met on tinder. I thought he was cute and he said I was cute as well. We talked very little before he invited me over.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? He had asked me to come over and watch tv with him but we both got busy. Later that day he invited me over again, to cuddle and watch tv. When I said yes, he said he couldn’t until like 1am, but I really wanted to cuddle with someone and maybe I’d have my first kiss. I went over and I immediately realized he was a lot shorter than I thought, but it was too late to turn back. We went to his dorm room and got into his lofted bed and just started cuddling. Then he started to kiss me.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? Started with cuddling. Then we started making out, it was my first kiss. Eventually he took his shirt and pants off and he took my shirt off as well. He kept asking me to take my pants off and I kept saying no. We moved to his couch and I started giving him a hand job, but that quickly turned into a blowjob. Pretty sure he was drunk so it took him a long time to finish and I honestly got kind of bored. He finished in my hand. He said it was really good though. He asked me to stay the night, but I left soon after.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Somewhat

Did you have an orgasm? No, not even close

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I felt a bit guilty. He keeps messaging me to hang out again and get dinner, but frankly I’m just not that attracted to him and I don’t really want to do it again right now.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) No penetrative sex happened

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, I was feeling lonely

How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How intoxicated was your partner? Drunk/high but not wasted

What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? A little bit

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? My friends. They were shocked I did it. Said I was a different person.

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? A little bit

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure

Do you regret this hookup? Somewhat

Why do you regret this hookup? Because I feel like I shouldn’t have done it. Wish I would’ve been actually attracted to the guy that was my first kiss and BJ.

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Making out was kind of fun.

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? How long the blowjob went on.

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Not too much.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Somewhat positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I’m slightly more open to casual sex, or sex before marriage anyways. Not 100% it’s for me though.

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? I think it’s very interesting.

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!