Not Lost in Translation



What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 20
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
Highest education received: Some college (currently in college)
What’s your current relationship status? Single
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual

Not Lost In Translation

How long ago did this hookup happen? Two nights ago

What was your relationship status at the time? Single

How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand

How long did you know the person before this hookup? Just met that day

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? Tall Japanese man, 24, very cute, mature, fun to talk to. Met him in a club in Shibuya.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? I was dancing in a nightclub in Shibuya, when I felt him come up next to me, he said hi, gently put his arm around my waist while we were dancing. We were jumping with the music, having a good time, then he kissed my forehead and I just leaned in and we started making out. After a bit of that, he bought me a drink, then he wanted to leave with me so I grabbed my stuff and followed him into the night. The trains weren’t running since it was 2 AM, so we were just looking for a place to hang out. We walked for a long time until we came across the Love Hotel Hill. He got us a room and I just went with it. This was my first experience in one and it was much tamer than I expected. I didn’t even know it was a designated love hotel until I looked up the name the next day.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? He was sweet and affectionate before, during and after the hookup, kissing my forehead and holding my hand. We made out for a bit, started touching each other, he sucked and licked my breasts and I performed oral him. Then we got down to missionary sex which was very deep and hot. I don’t normally get very loud but I was practically screaming towards the end. After that, I showered and we slept naked in each other’s arms in the bed. The next morning around 6 AM, both of us happened to be awake at the same time so he started fingering me and then we proceeded to go for missionary sex again, even more satisfying than last night. Afterwards we laid in bed together, sleeping a bit more.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? After we got our clothes back on in the morning and our stuff together, we checked out of the love hotel and he walked me back to the metro station. We talked a bit more in Japanese during and we shared some more about ourselves. When we got to the station, he suggested that we keep in touch so I gave him my contact info. It was a really great experience and he was a nice guy. We parted with a long deep kiss and that was it for now. I don’t know if we will get in touch again but I’m hopeful that we will.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Learning new things, experimenting, Thought it was an important experience to have, Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it

How intoxicated were you? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it

What substances did you consume? Alcohol

How intoxicated was your partner? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it

What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? A couple of close friends, including the person I went to the nightclub with. They seemed impressed.

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Do you regret this hookup? Not at all

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Meeting a sweet and affectionate and confident guy who showed me a part of Tokyo that I never thought I would get to see.

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Having to pretty much ditch my friend after getting my wallet and stuff back from her.

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? It gave me a confidence and ego boost, changed the way I think about nightclubs in general, made me want to do it again.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative

Anything else you want to add about this hookup? There was a risk factor considering that I was leaving with a stranger and my phone was dying so I couldn’t easily call for help if I needed it, though luckily nothing bad happened. The hookup itself wasn’t something I had actively planned but a part of me was secretly wondering/hoping that it would.

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I think that it’s okay as long as the intentions are made clear and nobody leads the other on.

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? A really great place to get experiences off your chest, both good and bad.

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!