Turning Point

by Golden Jay

What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 38
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? United States
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
What’s your occupation? Laborer
What’s your current relationship status? Dating casually
Religious affiliation: Agnostic
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Bisexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? Pansexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 12
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

Turning Point

How long ago did this hookup happen? 3 months

What was your relationship status at the time? Single

How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a week

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? Mid-40s white male, about 6 foot tall with an athlete build turning stocky. Met through a dating app and decided to hook up on the spur of the moment.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? He initiated contact on the dating app. He said he was in town on business for the weekend and thought I was extremely sexy. He invited me to his hotel room and I met him there.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We met and made out on the bed for a while. We gave each other oral and then he asked if I wanted to have anal sex with me topping him. He came while I was inside him and I finished on him. I felt sexy and appreciated during. He treated me as though I were the hottest guy he had ever seen. It ended after we both cleaned up in the bathroom. He thanked me and said it was awesome. I left.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Somewhat

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, one

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I felt a little empty and a little used later. I had no expectations as it was just a one-time hookup. I think he was a nice, horny guy who got what he wanted.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) None, Discussed STI testing history, I don’t know if my partner was on any (other) method

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Learning new things, experimenting, Thought it was an important experience to have, To feel more desirable, To feel more confident, I was feeling lonely, Everyone else was/is doing it, It was easy / convenient

How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? I don’t know / I’m not sure

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? No one

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? I didn’t tell anyone

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? A little bit

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Do you regret this hookup? A little bit

Why do you regret this hookup? I don’t think it was right for me.

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? I learned that I am more interested in sex with a partner that I am emotionally connected to.

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Residual sad, empty feelings after

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? I am OK with casual sex, but it isn’t for me at this time in my life.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? A little positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative

Anything else you want to add about this hookup? He did a lot to boost my confidence and make me feel sexy. However, afterwards, he kind of ruined it by being dismissive and borderline rude.

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I think casual sex is fine at times but you have to know if you are doing it for the right reasons. Also, it is not for everyone.

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!