Unexpected Night



What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 42
What’s your race/ethnicity? Hispanic / Latino/a
What continent do you live on? South America
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (eg., MA, MS, PhD, JD, MD)
What’s your current relationship status? In a serious relationship (monogamous)
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 7
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

Unexpected Night

How long ago did this hookup happen? Four years

What was your relationship status at the time? Single

How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For more than 3 years

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? We had met probably thirty years before. However, she was a little girl then and I was much older. We participated together in after-school activities and were never real close friends but rather acquaintances. We got in contact via social media and mostly because we shared similar political views. We had dinner once and had a fun time sharing stories.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? I had recently broken up with my girlfriend of one year. I was coming back home from having lunch with friends. My friends were supposed to come over as well to continue drinking and socializing. I decided to invite my friend over because the last thing I knew was that she lived across the street from me. She came over and we started drinking and talking. My friends didn’t show up so I called – it turned out that one of them got sick so I was left alone with my long-time acquaintance. There was no planning about it – I certainly did not plan on it. However, at some point she started saying how much she looked up to me when she was a kid and I was a teenager, how much she liked me then. And so… we kissed.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We were buzzed from drinking vodka. After we kissed we went immediately to my room and undressed. I went down on her and then we had vaginal sex, first doggy-style, then missionary-style and then she on top. We came, relaxed and ate something. After resting for a bit she gave me a minor blow job and we went at it again. It went on like this. In total we hooked up four times that night.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I felt awkward because that had not been the plan all along and I met my exgirlfriend the next day – she had been trying to lure me back since I had broken up with her. I had no future expectations with this person. I still like her as a friend although we have not been able to see each other much since. It was a fun night that cannot be forgotten.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms, I don’t know if my partner was on any (other) method

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Intoxication, Revenge / Getting even, Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it

How intoxicated were you? A little tipsy/high

What substances did you consume? Alcohol

How intoxicated was your partner? A little tipsy/high

What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Not at all

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I didn’t give a clear ‘yes’, but I didn’t give a ‘no’

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? I don’t know / I’m not sure

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? Nobody

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? I didn’t tell anyone

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Do you regret this hookup? Not at all

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? The sex. It was amazing.

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Having to hide it from my then exgirlfriend (now girlfriend)

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Yes – I think casual sex is exciting and interesting as long as people are careful and do not get hurt in the process. I care less for moralistic stands on monogamy or sex as something that should happen only within romantic relationships.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I thought it was something difficult to have. i have not pursued it at all but having this experience was very nice.

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? It is interesting. even if it is only a way of telling someone about something I have not shared with anyone.

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!