Bitter Pills



What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 26
What’s your race/ethnicity? Black
What continent do you live on? Africa
What country and/or city do you live in? Kenya
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (currently pursuing)
What’s your occupation? Tax consultant
What’s your current relationship status? Single
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? Somewhat
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 22
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? none

Bitter Pills

How long ago did this hookup happen? A week ago

What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status

How would you best classify this hookup? Sex with an ex

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a year

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup?  He is my sister’s friend/acquaintance. We hooked up last year and actually almost had a serious thing which I backed off I wasn’t ready. I had mixed feeling about him before the latest hook up more like love/hate feelings maube I thought hooking up would clear my mind.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? he instigated it. he planned for it that very day he led everything

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end?  We had vaginal sex. It wasn’t bad but I wasn’t happy after it all.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Somewhat

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, one

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? he got distant and I decided I wont talk to him I blocked all communication avenues and I feel bad about him angry and resentful.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms

What were your motives for this hookup? Hoping or expecting it would lead to something more, I was feeling lonely, Submission / Relinquishing power, Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it

How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? A little bit

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I didn’t give a clear ‘yes’, but I didn’t give a ‘no’

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? No one

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Other

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Very

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure

Do you regret this hookup? Very much

Why do you regret this hookup? It made me depressed all week

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Nothing

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? We mulled over the same old things

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? I hate it

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Not at all positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Very negative

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? casual sex has made me a bitter person and I have come to hate men. I have a low self esteem cause some get abusive by using derogatory remarks on me. it has made me soo cynical about sex yet its a physical need and generally contributed to my ever creeping in unhappy state

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? I don’t know much about it I hope its a project that can help me deal with sexual hang-ups and matters I haven’t resolved

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!