Race/ethnicity: South Asian
Current location: Los Angeles, CA
Highest education received: Some college (currently in college)
Relationship status: Single
Religious affiliation: Agnostic
How religious are you? Not at all
Sexual orientation: Mostly heterosexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexual orientation/sexuality better/best? Queer
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 11
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
Lock the Door
How long ago did this hookup happen? 1.5 yrs
How would you best classify this hookup (e.g., one-night stand, fuck-buddies, friends-with-benefits, booty call, sex with an ex, short fling; paid sex…)? Sex with an ex
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? What I would like to call my Mexican fuck buddy straight from Tijuana was originally a guy I had met my freshman year of college. Towards the end of first year we had started flirting and by the end of the summer it was established that we would be physical once school started up again. It was a great month of fun sex (probably the best sex I’ve had) but I found out he was having sex with other girls and while monogamy wasn’t an issue to me, he was being weird and stringing me along so I ended it and decided that I would just play sexual mind games on him from then forward. I harbored some contempt towards him and thought he was a skeezy guy but mostly my feelings were kind of hurt.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We ran into each other at a party a couple months later and I was feeling pretty frustrated because I had not had sex with any body in three months. After some sassy banter and light flirting I ask if he wants to come come back with me to my car to have sex. He asks me, “Are you serious??” and I grab his dick and say, “Yes idiot”. We walked towards my car which was parked on the street and before I open the door to get in I stop and tell him, “This is a quickie. Do you understand? QUICK-IE”.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? It was purely penetration. No foreplay, no kissing, nothing. I was kind of sick, so I didn’t want to kiss him but I didn’t tell him that. He tried to kiss me and I would lean away which I knew confused him, meaning my games were working. I didn’t even know that we could even be aroused based on the bluntness of our encounter but I was wet and he was hard. He put on a condom and we started having vaginal sex in the backseat, switching positions based on comfort and convenience. I would be on top, or he would. Despite having sex, I was deriving no pleasure. I was feeling bored, which I realized when I started falling asleep. To be fair, it was late.
Did you have an orgasm? Did your partner(s)? I didn’t. Neither did he.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? Did you discuss STI history? I made him use a condom.
What were your REASONS for having this hookup? I just wanted to fuck with his head and treat him like shit. I mean, he’s not a super sensitive guy, I knew he wouldn’t be affected. Mostly it was a personal experiment, just to see what would happen.
Were alcohol or drugs involved? If so, how much? I must have been drinking, not that much though. I did smoke weed, but that didn’t propel me to do what I did. I was just being an asshole.
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it? What are your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? After about 30 minutes I was getting irritated so I told him to stop. I started to put on my pants and he asked me what I was doing, “I told you quickie, asshole”, I said. So I got out and he yells, “I’m still in your car!!”. So I say, “Yeah, lock the door. I want to go back to the party”. Then I left and rejoined my friends. When I came home I felt really empty, that despite treating this guy like how he treated me I was unsatisfied. I felt bad. I’m still kind of friends with the guy today, I like him as a person and I feel we’ll always have a special social bond that will keep us on good terms.
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I didn’t want to tell any of my friends because they knew about him and his habits. They thought he was gross and I felt like they would have judged me. I did tell my male roommate, who was somewhat detached from my private life. I told him what had happened and that I felt bad. I asked him if I should reach out to the guy and apologize, but my room mate simply said, “Nah, fuck it. Don’t make it more weird”.
Was this a consensual and/or wanted experience for you? For your partner? It was consensual and wanted for both of us.
Do you regret this hookup? If so, why? I don’t regret it. It was a very interesting experience.
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? How about the WORST? Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? The funniest part about this, was that the guy responded so positively to me treating him like shit. He messaged me afterwards, telling me we should do it again. We never did. Sometimes to mess with him, I would text him that I was horny and down to fuck. He would message back, an hour later asking, “DID I MISS IT?? AM I TOO LATE”. I’d reply, “Yeahhh, sorry. Maybe next time”, when I had no intention of sleeping with him at all. I felt in charge of my sexuality, that I was a woman wielding my sexy charm over men. That is when I realized it is super easy to get men to have sex with you. Women, an entirely different story.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? A little positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative
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