What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 24
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? California
Highest education received: Some college (currently in college)
What’s your occupation? Student
What’s your current relationship status? Single
Religious affiliation: Agnostic
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Mostly heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 25-30
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 1
My Perfect Summer Fling
How long ago did this hookup happen? Last week
What was your relationship status at the time? Single
How would you best classify this hookup? Short fling
How long did you know the person before this hookup? Just met that day
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? We met on Tinder while he was on vacation visiting his grandparents by the beach. He was a super-babe – freckles, piercing eyes, full lips. Tall, lanky. All cheek-bones and summer dreams. He was such a charmer and way too dreamy – he sang and played guitar and his style. Oof. To sleep, perchance to dream…
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? He Tinder messaged me to hang out with him down by the water. I was a bit skeptical, because it was already pretty late, but we ended up establishing trust and I agreed. I walked up and he was playing guitar. We sat and looked out at the moon hitting the inky surf and talked about ourselves. He had an easy way about him. The sort of person you can tell is used to getting a lot of attention and is comfortable with it. He seemed very at peace with himself and passionate about his life. He seemed very whole, very real.
We ended up leaving the beach and buying beer at 7/11. I kept thinking about how funny it is to meet someone in the dark, have a conversation, and then walk into the bright lights of a convenience store. I kept laughing knowing that I was obviously checking him out and he was very likely doing the same to me. How could we not? We journeyed to a nearby park, a really beautiful one, right by the ocean. We sat on the swings and talked more about life. I got cold and we walked up to my car and he offered me his sweater. I mentioned that it was interesting to be wearing his sweater – how intimate it was. He asked if he could kiss me, and I said yes, and we made out under the sky and then went a bit further.
The next day we went to the beach in the afternoon. It was a perfect day – the water was warm and the sun was shining. I wore my favorite black one-piece. He sang songs to me and played guitar under our umbrella, and I stared at him and couldn’t help but smile. I had the whole sky in my eyes and it was blue and gold. We laughed and made stupid jokes and swam and pretended like we in a great romance. I closed my eyes and he kissed my neck and I couldn’t help but feel like time was stopping and the world was tangible.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end?
That night, our last hours together, we went to a bar and walked around the beach. I liked walking next to him, touching him, being in the world with him. We went back to my car and got into the back seat. We started making out, and he took off my skirt. I took off his sweater. He kissed my neck; I kissed his. I went down on him; he came in my mouth. He went down on me; I started moaning and came quickly. I took him back to his grandparent’s house, with El Scorcho by Weezer blaring from my car speakers into the quiet summer’s night air. We sang along. He got out of the car, I gave him a hug. He waved and walked away, his shoulders slanted towards the ground, moving towards his own life, back to his reality. I turned around and walked back to mine.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very
Did you have an orgasm? Yes, one
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I woke up the next day and the morning light felt too bright and way too harsh. Reality had become oppressive. But there it was, taunting me. Goodbye… goodbye. Goodbye?!?
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) No penetrative sex happened
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Learning new things, experimenting, Emotional intimacy, closeness, connection
How intoxicated were you? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it
What substances did you consume? Alcohol
How intoxicated was your partner? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it
What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? No one really.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? I didn’t tell anyone
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Summer babe!!! Having the perfect fling. Having time mean something. Being alive. Feeling high. Having someone just exist and be so…. beautiful, charming, indescribable…
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? HAVING TO SAY GOODBYE AND WALK AWAY AND NOT SEE THE PERSON EVER AGAIN.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Yeah, it made me want to exist more in the world.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
Anything else you want to add about this hookup? I’ve been listening to El Scorcho all week.
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? Casual sex rules!
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? It rules.
You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!