The Quiet Boy

by Allie

Gender: Female
Age: 29
Race/ethnicity: White
Current location: Toronto-ish
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
Occupation: Public service
Relationship status: Single
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
Sexual orientation: Mostly heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 14
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

The Quiet Boy

How long ago did this hookup happen? One year ago

How would you best classify this hookup (e.g., one-night stand, fuck-buddies, friends-with-benefits, booty call, sex with an ex, short fling; paid sex…)? Sex with a near-stranger. Three night stand? Hahah.

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? Average height, average build. Handsome in a small-town kind of way, in his cowboy hat. We didn’t know each other very well – we’d met a week earlier at an event, discussed our mutual interest in country music, and he agreed to join my friend and I at a festival the next weekend. We hadn’t talked much besides that. Even slightly drunk at the initial event, I was distracted by someone else and we hadn’t flirted.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? The first day of the festival, the three of us (my female friend, myself, and him) spent the day together, setting up tents, watching music, drinking beer. Nothing out of the ordinary, no tension. My friend and I included him as much as possible to keep him from feeling like a third wheel, but he held his own, ventured off when he wanted, was a good conversationalist. I’m usually something of a seductress but I was distracted, again, by other prospects, and by the heat, and the rain. I felt immensely unsexy and wasn’t trying to be charming.
On the way back to the camping area late at night, everyone had to walk through a short tunnel in the dark. At some point while we were walking in the dark, he brushed up against me and held my hand. Electricity. That knowing. Completely unexpected. I’m usually so good at seeing these things coming. I actually said “Oh.” out loud.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? My friend had decided earlier in the day to sleep in her car, which she often did at festivals, preferring that to sleeping in the tent, so he and I had the tent to ourselves and he kissed me almost immediately once the door was closed. I laughed. I said “I didn’t see this coming.” It was different, he wasn’t my type, I hadn’t seduced him, I was wet from the rain and surprised that he liked me. I kissed him back. We were naked right away, in the dark, laughing. He was a fantastic kisser.
His dick was big, probably the biggest I’ve been with, and felt good in my hand. I went down on him and he came fairly quickly in comparison to other partners. He didn’t want to stop, kept kissing me, playing with me. I asked if he had condoms. He said yes, asked if I was sure. I said yes. We had sex for a long time with him on top and it was fantastic, the best sex I’d ever had by a wide margin. I felt comfortable. I wondered where he’d learned some of the things he did. We were trying to be so quiet and at some point he put his hand over my mouth and that turned me on but I could tell he was uncomfortable, being so controlling. He came again, we kissed, we slept.

Did you have an orgasm? Did your partner(s)? I didn’t, but I almost never do during intercourse, especially not with new partners. He did twice, one from oral, one during penetration.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? Did you discuss STI history? We used condoms, and no, no discussion, but I trusted him, we seemed to be on the same page in terms of ensuring our continued cleanliness. That’s a terrible attitude, I should have asked, hahaha.

What were your REASONS for having this hookup? I felt wanted. It was the first time in a long time that I hadn’t been the assertive one. It felt good.

Were alcohol or drugs involved? If so, how much? No drugs, some beer but not much. 3 or 4 cans each over the whole day.

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it? What are your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? We continued to hook up at the festival, two more nights in the tent, and it was good, fine, uncomplicated. It was refreshing to not have to talk about feelings or plans. 
He’s in my larger acquaintance circle so I’ve seen him a couple of times in the last year but haven’t talked much. We’re both in relationships now and haven’t really kept in touch, nor do I really want to.

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? My friend who was with us found out about it on the last day, because the hookup put his arm around me and she questioned me about it later. A few other friends have found out over time, although I haven’t shared specific details with anyone. 
Not much of a reaction from anyone besides general support!

Was this a consensual and/or wanted experience for you? For your partner? Consensual for both of us. If the situation was presented to me again, then or now, I would probably sleep with him again.

Do you regret this hookup? If so, why? No regrets, had fun.

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? How about the WORST? Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? The best part was definitely the fun in general – surprised me, felt good, good kissing, good sex, was fun to have to try to keep quiet while there were people around us. It was simple, uncomplicated.
The worst part was … hmm. I think my friend may have felt a bit excluded once she found out. Not excluded from the sex, but just excluded in general, as though she’d been a third wheel the whole weekend, although I think she only felt that way after the fact.
Hasn’t really changed my perspective on casual sex – I was supportive of it before and I’m still supportive of it!

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative

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