What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 25
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? USA
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (currently pursuing)
What’s your occupation? Student
What’s your current relationship status? Dating casually
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? Somewhat
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 9
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
Summer college hookup
How long ago did this hookup happen? 3 years
What was your relationship status at the time? Single
How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a year
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? She and I met while working for our university as student employees. One summer, we both ended up staying in our college town to take classes and get in some hours at work.
Prior to the hookup, I thought she was very attractive. She had that rare look where she could be cute one day and hot the next.
She was pretty reserved while we were on the job, and I am a very outgoing type, so I didn’t think she was my type anyway. We did have a good rapport, though.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We ran into each other at a party at a friend’s apartment. At one point, when we were each quite drunk, she approached me in the kitchen and said she knew I was into her. I was taken aback. I wasn’t really interested in her the way she thought I was, for personal and work-related reasons. In my drunken state, however, I told her that I knew she was into me too. I don’t know why I said it, but I’m glad I did, because she immediately began aggressively making out with me. I didn’t stop her. A few people saw, which is quite rare for me (although not a rare sight at college parties). We pretty quickly went back to my apartment while the party was still in full swing.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? Seconds after getting in the door, we were making out on my bed. Like I said, she was reserved at work, but her sexual personality was far more controlling. In and of itself, that was a turn-on. We engaged in some basic foreplay (fingering, handjob, blowjob, oral on her) and pretty soon began having intercourse. She was very good: she knew what she liked and she knew how to move. She was a little louder than I was used to, and I could tell she was very into it. This sex was definitely more primal than sensual. As far as I can remember, it was entirely doggy and her on top.
We had been going at it for about 20 minutes, and in my drunken state, I knew I couldn’t keep it up much longer. She got on top and began riding me very hard. She was fully in control by the point, and I was loving it. Right when I thought I couldn’t last a second longer, her moans got louder and higher in pitch. She soon had a very loud, quivering orgasm. As you can imagine, I finished pretty quickly after that.
We cuddled for barely a few minutes, then she got dressed, kissed me goodbye, and left. Most of my sex up until that point had been within the bounds of serious relationships, so I was a little unprepared for how businesslike it felt once we were done. But the sex was great, so I wasn’t too upset.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Ver
Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? We continued to work together. One of us would bring it up playfully every once in awhile (in private, of course). It really felt like it brought us closer together. We never hooked up again, but it felt like we had this pleasant little secret between us.
We haven’t kept in touch in awhile. I wish her the best.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Condoms, Birth control pill / patch / ring / injection / implant
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Intoxication, Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it, It was easy / convenient
How intoxicated were you? Drunk/high but not wasted
What substances did you consume? Alcohol
How intoxicated was your partner? Drunk/high but not wasted
What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? A little bit
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I casually told a few of my close friends that I had gotten laid with a girl from work. I don’t think anyone thought it was a big deal. It was a big school, and none of them knew her.
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? Getting to see this quiet, reserved college girl from work turn into a very sexually in-control woman in the bedroom
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Not much. It would have been nice to hook up more, but it’s fine that we didn’t.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? I learned firsthand that casual sex, with no emotional connection, can be very fun.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? People have casual sex because it’s fun. When properly done, everyone has a good time and no one leaves hurt. There doesn’t need to be a stigma about it (the way there is for women) but it also doesn’t necessarily have to be glorified (the way it is for men). If you’re a woman who enjoys casual sex, great. If you’re a man who doesn’t, that’s fine too.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? I hope it can remove the stigma surrounding casual sex
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