What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 75
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? Australia
What country and/or city do you live in? Australia
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (eg., MA, MS, PhD, JD, MD)
What’s your occupation? Retired
What’s your current relationship status? Engaged/Married (monogamous)
Religious affiliation: Atheist
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Bisexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? Married homosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? Lost count
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
How long ago did this hookup happen? 45 years
What was your relationship status at the time? Engaged/Married (monogamous)
How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand
How long did you know the person before this hookup? Just met that day
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He was a handsome young Italian guy, very nice body, engaging about 10 years young than me. He was a total stranger. I met him, or more accurately he met me, by the pool of a motel where we were vacationing.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? I was on a lounge beside the motel pool. He got out of the pool and lay on an adjacent lounge. Nothing was planned. He started chatting – the usual introductory small talk, where do you live etc. It developed into more personal, IRL, friend, things: are you married, do you have a girlfriend family. No, he didn’t have a girlfriend. What we would now call my gaydar began to signal. I had a lot of sex with my male peers in adolescence, including a best friend with whom I had regularly fucked since we were boys and met up a few times in our 20s, our last some 8 years earlier. Satisfaction of adolescent physical needs extended to feeling increasingly attracted to other guys, which persisted. My masturbatory fantasies centered on them, even after marriage. This when he asked if I would like to see his room, the motel comprising different layouts of units, I was aroused, at least psychologically and agreed, unsure of where it might lead.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We went to his room wearing only our speedos. I asked if I could use the bathroom. I pulled down my speedos to pee, then, my heart racing, I decided to emerge naked, half hard holding my speedos and asked if he had a towel I could use. He froze, pulled down his speedos, to reveal a beautiful, uncut cock which sprang immediately to a full erection. I moved towards him, we embraced, kissed and felt each others’ cocks. He drew back slightly, inserted his hard cock between my thighs and began to fuck, My rigid cock was pressed hard against his belly. With a couple of thrusts he began to come. I could feel his warm spunk between my thighs as I ejaculated over his belly. It was all over in seconds.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very
Did you have an orgasm? Yes, one
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I cleaned up quickly, pulled up my speedos, thanked him and left. I was on a high. psychologically. It was deeply satisfying, fulfilling a need that I realised I had but subjugated to the imperatives of society. Homosexuality was not only unacceptable but a crime. I had come late to heterosexual intercourse, but physically hugely enjoyed the feel of a woman’s body, the softness of a vagina and the pleasure ejaculating into its furthest reaches. The orgasm I experienced was more intense than anything I had experienced with another guy, but there remained the persistent attraction to my own sex and the psychological satisfaction I derived from that sex. That night the two elements of my sexuality converged when I had the most extraordinary orgasm fucking my wife while thinking of what I had experienced a few hours earlier.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) None
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it, It was easy / convenient
How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? I don’t know / I’m not sure
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I didn’t give a clear ‘yes’, but I didn’t give a ‘no’
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? I don’t know / I’m not sure
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave a clear ‘no’
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? No one
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? I didn’t tell anyone
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure
Do you regret this hookup? A little bit
Why do you regret this hookup? Cheating on my wife, succumbing to an urge that I thought I had dealt with when I married and started enjoying a very active heterosexual life.
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? The psychological satisfaction it gave me and beginning to come to terms with my deep seated feelings.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Cheating on my family.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Very profoundly. It was the start of a pattern of behaviour to which I returned several years later, to which I gave increasingly loose rein and became an integral part of my life.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Somewhat negative
Anything else you want to add about this hookup? It confirmed in my mind something which subconsciously I knew about my sexuality and psychological drives.
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? It seems to be and always has been a part of human experience, like homosexuality. It is now more open, but it can be destructive of relationships when partners’ views differ on the subject.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? It is a valid subject for study and as with any aspect of the human condition the better we understand it the more human we are.
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