Age: early 40’s
Current location: Germany
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (eg., MA, MS, PhD, JD, MD)
Relationship status: Married
Religious affiliation: Christian
How religious are you? Not at all
Sexual orientation: Heterosexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexual orientation/sexuality better/best? love women who are beautiful inside and out
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? +-20
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
The Colleague’s Neighbour
How long ago did this hookup happen? 3 weeks, ongoing
How would you best classify this hookup (e.g., one-night stand, fuck-buddies, friends-with-benefits, booty call, sex with an ex, short fling; paid sex…)? One-night leading to fwb
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? She was good-looking and fun-loving, the last aspect much different from my always bitching wife who I went with to this party of my colleague. I had seen and noticed HER on another party of my colleague about a year or two ago. She lives in the same house. No real contact then.
Sometime after the first meeting my colleague told me that she had been left with her two young kids for another woman – which I could absolutely not understand then and now as I think she is the perfect mate.
Well, this time I had just quarreled with my wife earlier that day and then we went to the party. I wanted to get drunk a little but as I’m not much into alcohol these days it was pretty hard for me to physically drink that much. SHE (fwb) was pretty drunk when we arrived and got even more drunk during the evening.
Spent the most part of the evening with colleagues and friends chatting about this and that. At around midnight my wife left as she was tired and I stayed. Went into the kitchen as that was where SHE was having fun with some other people. I’m usually not that talkative but blended in nicely and we chatted and made jokes for another hour or two. We were facing each other and I Iooked at her quite often and she at me but just very brief glances. Then there was one time when our eyes really interlocked and I felt a warm tingle going down my spine. It seemed to last many seconds – to us at least, I guess.
More talking and more drinks, I think we finished the keg – well, mostly her.
Then she announced loudly that she was going to bed now. When she passed me she said less loudly that I could come by if I wanted, she lived in the basement apartment.
About 20 minutes later I excused myself and left for her apartment.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? Lots of short eye contact, talking and generally having a good time. Then we both locked our eyes. I like to think that I am pretty shy and she instigated it, but I guess we both felt a similar attraction and it just happened. The room around us fell into silence – for me.
What she definitely did was to invite me to her place – something I would have never have dared to do in these circumstances. And something I couldn’t have done as my wife was sleeping in our bed at home.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? She opened the door in her (pretty short) nightgown, smiling all over.
We took place on the sofa and started kissing and fondling immediately.
We were all over each other with hands and mouth. I was touching her breasts, something I love doing with women, and also her wet vagina, again something I love but – of course – don’t get to do that often with other persons than my wife.
Again, loooots of kissing – which was really good and intensive. Most of the time she was sitting on top of me, which I also liked a lot as I could feel her up very well, touching her breasts and her nice bottom.
At some moment she took off my shirt and went into my trousers, stroking my very hard dick. Incredibly enough I was nowhere near an orgasm at this time which is very different from sex with my wife where I tend to come quite early.
I went down on her several times, but not for really long and I could not really tell if SHE was into it. One disturbing thing was that she was texting quite a lot on her mobile with a friend (at 3ish in the morning!). I didn’t really know what to make of that. At one time SHE went down on me and this was when I felt I would come sooner or later. So after a while I pulled her away as I didn’t really want to come that way and then. I was afraid of getting tired quickly afterwards and also of my conscience kicking in.
Kissed and fondled some more, then eventually, at around five in the morning I left for home as I wanted to be in bed before my wife would get up in the morning.
The idea of being next to her (wife) with the smell and sex of another women all over me made me feel quite good actually after all the bitching and nagging over the past months.
Did you have an orgasm? Did your partner(s)? I was close and there was pre-cum, but other than that no and no.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? Did you discuss STI history? None and no, we didn’t have intercourse. She invited me several times to have sex with her and said she had condoms, but as of the reasons above I didn’t want to.
What were your REASONS for having this hookup? Attraction – lots of. She was clever, fun-loving and seemed like a good mate.
Then lots of dissatisfaction with my wife. We are going through a very difficult time and I don’t really know if it’s something pathological or just that she is stressed out (she works half-time and we have got three kids – but so do many other families).
She is often really bad and mean towards me and she uses sex to hurt me, i.e. saying that I’m a pervert for wanting it, or e.g. wanting her on top, and when we start to fight she uses it to hurt my feelings. I am a stong-willed person myself, but I have been very tame and weak with her lately as I don’t want to risk my family. Maybe because of that she has even increased her verbal abuse lately?
Were alcohol or drugs involved? If so, how much? Alcohol – a lot. I was sober enough to know exactly what I was doing and I guess SHE basically was, too. But I think she probably was bolder than usual because of it when whe invited me to her place – especially after having seen me with my wife and knowing that I am a workmate of her neighour.
Second time we were both sober.
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it? What are your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I went home, feeling really good and elevated. I took immense pleasure out of the act itself and also out of the knowledge that I had done this ‘to’ my wife. It felt so good all the next day long smelling the other woman on my fingers and body and knowing what had happened. That there was indeed someone who enjoyed me for my person, my body and my penis!
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? No one.
Was this a consensual and/or wanted experience for you? For your partner? Yes, for both of us.
Do you regret this hookup? If so, why? Not at all. Have seen her once again since and we kissed and cuddled again. We went to her bed and fondled each other, no sex as she had her period. She fell asleep in my arms which I really, really liked. It felt so natural, so at home.
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? How about the WORST? Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Being totally uninhibited with another woman who is not my wife. Seeing that I was attractive for someone even as a married dad of three with a house and a fairly boring job.
I had been into casual sex when I was younger, quite a bit. It just hadn’t happened lately because of a lack of occasion and me having become a bit rusty (sorry, my English). It felt awkward chatting up women and there just hadn’t been occasions. I had started to feel that I was totaly uninteresting to other women.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
Anything else you want to add about this hookup or anything else? I have met her again. I hope to become friends with benefits with her.
I also hope that it might make me more powerful and self-conscious against my nagging, bitching wife.
But I want to be careful that there won’t be too many emotions as I absolutely don’t want to risk my family and hurt my little kids. Before the kids or maybe once they are out of the house that might have been different, but for the moment I have a responsibility.
That doesn’t have to keep me from realising and living my sexualilty, though.
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