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What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 44
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? USA
Highest education received: Some college (not currently in college)
What’s your occupation? Domestic Goddess
What’s your current relationship status? Engaged/Married (open)
Religious affiliation: self belief
How religious are you? Somewhat
What’s your sexual orientation? Mostly heterosexual
Any other term(s) that describe your sexuality or sexual identity? confident, knows what I want and like, said to be aggressive
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 300+
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

The Cougar and the cub

How long ago did this hookup happen? 6 months ago

What was your relationship status at the time? Engaged/Married (open)

How would you best classify this hookup? Friends-with-benefits

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a week

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He was SO sexy. Dark brown hair, longer and pulled back. Tattooed, long goatee. I met him the night before at a bar. We talked and laughed all night. I saved him from a cray cray midget chick and he saved me from a dude named Forrest following me around. The following night we agreed to meet back up. He asked me the first night to take him home with me.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? Again Friday night at the bar. Said no to taking him home the first night and meet up again the next night. I don’t take men ” home” so I did plan and got a hotel room. I kept the room my secret until we left. I guess I instigated it but he was elated to find out I had a room.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We had been close all night. His personality was erotic and sexy as fuck. He was forward but I liked it. Innuendos were all over the place. I don’t drink ever, he does. If he had hang ups they didn’t show? When we pulled into the drive of motel and I flashed the key his face lit up and he said ” I knew you would be fun.” Walking to the door he kissed me, threw me over his shoulder and carried me off. I barely had shut the door and his hands were in my hair and he kissed me like I’ve never been kissed. And I’m not a kisser really but I couldn’t get enough of his. Clothes flew, I gave him a blow job, he gave me oral. Both of us were kinda surprised how well we were digging each other. Nothing was awkward or weird. And the passion fueling all of it was mind numbing. We took a small after oral break. And out of the blue he gave me a kiss that took my breath away with his hand on my neck and one in my hair. With zero effort he lifted me up and on top of him. I slid on him with one perfect fluid motion. He was vocal and I friggin loved it. Calling me baby and honey, telling me how beautiful I was. How good I felt. He was gentle but not. He had power over me I can’t explain. We were spent after. And he was pretty buzzed. We just fell asleep wrapped around each other. We woke at 8 the next morning. Not weird or awkward. He took me to get coffee and then to my car. We parted?

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very

Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? After the hook up I was like a kitter cat in a patch of sunshine! We parted so gracefully…we both knew it wasn’t the last time we’d fuck. So satisfied but yep wanted more. We had exchanged #’s the first night we met. I am married but my husband knows what I do. This has spun into a true FWB. He’s a great guy but all we do is fuck. I care about him as I would a good friend. But a relationship with him…no. Leave my husband? Never. Hate to say he brings NOTHING to the table for me regarding the rest of my life except he is good to me when together and the sex is stupid good.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) None, Withdrawal, Sterilization, Exchanged recent STI test results

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Submission / Relinquishing power, Making new friends

How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How intoxicated was your partner? A little tipsy/high

What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol, Marijuana, hashish

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Very

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? My husband and my best friend. Husband thought it was hot and gf is no longer surprised to my shenanigans.

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Relatively positive

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Do you regret this hookup? Not at all

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? That it was 6 months ago and I found the perfect sexual partner for me. I now have the best of both worlds. Married to a wonderful man, amped up our sex life. Found a guy who fucks me how I like it. And I’m terribly physically attracted to him. Oh yes… he’s 12 years younger than me

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? He is living in a camper in his Mom’s yard lol I don’t give a shit! I’ll bang the hell out of him anywhere? But the whole Mom, camper thing is a bit embarrassing but funny.

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? This hook up created a few monsters. I’m terribly confident and know I have a certain power in this. It’s quite easy to entertain the thought of manipulation. And a few feelings being caught and some bruised because I won’t consider deeper feelings

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard?  casual sex has been a part of my life ever since I started having sex. I’ve always been a open sexual creature that a lot of people find intimidating or seen as aggressive. I think if you’re comfortable with yourself as a sexual being then casual sex isn’t as dirty as Society has made it. Some people express themselves painting, I do it with sex? I think if more people were able to have sex without so many feelings involved and enjoy the act itself things would be so much easier. And on the most part it’s a scientific thing that once you’ve been with someone intimately three times or more you do begin to have feelings for them. Unless you’re someone like me who is comfortable in their sexuality enjoys the ACT and the actual person instead of throwing love in there.

What do you think about the Casual Sex Project?  I think it’s an interesting topic and positive that much information will be gained from it.

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!