by Alexandra

Gender: Female
Age: 18
Race/ethnicity: White
Current location: Germany
Highest education received: Some college (currently in college)
Occupation: Student
Relationship status: Single
Religious affiliation: Atheist
Sexual orientation: Mostly heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 7
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

The Other Woman

How long ago did this hookup happen? 3 weeks

How would you best classify this hookup (e.g., one-night stand, fuck-buddies, friends-with-benefits, booty call, sex with an ex, short fling; paid sex…)? Affair

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? His name was Marco and he was 20. He was about 1,75-1,80 m tall, brown hair and Italian. He is the boyfriend of my best friend’s sister. We met at new years eve for the first time. We celebrated with a group of friends and Marco and me got along very well. We talked and it was fun until his gf made a scene because she thought we were flirting. She got very angry and threw me out of the appartment. I decided this night, that I never again want to have any contact with Marco or his jealous gf.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? About three months later, I went to a party with my friend. She drank too much and had to throw up, so I got her a taxi but afterwards I was alone at the party. Then I met Marco and some of his friends. They offered me to spend the evening with them and so I did. After the party Marco and me waited outside of the club for his friends. We talked about what was going on in our lives and I told him, that I was having a bf but I wasn’t happy at all, because we hadn’t talked/seen us for 2 weeks. He said that my bf was probably cheating and all of a sudden he kissed me. I told him to stop, but he didn’t. He took my hand and led me to some hidden room by the club, in there we started to make out and then had sex.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? During the hookup I had to cry, because I was just too confused and felt guilty for my bf and his gf, but on the other side it felt so right with him to be there. He was an excellent lover. He took over control and fucked me hard from behind. Afterwards he hugged me and said I deserved better than my current bf and then we got dressed and went home.

Did you have an orgasm? Did your partner(s)? Yes, we both had an orgasm.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? Did you discuss STI history? I was on the pill, but we had no condom so we talked about STIs and decided that it was ok without condom.

What were your REASONS for having this hookup? I don’t really know. I guess, I was just very unhappy in this moment because my bf and needed someone who’s there for me and he was sympathetic to me from the beginning. He has like some sort of attraction towards me.

Were alcohol or drugs involved? If so, how much? Yes, alcohol.. I don’t remember how much, but we were both pretty wasted.

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it? What are your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? One week after the hookup I broke up with my bf, because the relationship didn’t feel right. I didn’t tell him about Marco. But my bf told me he cheated on me with his ex from the beginning of our relationship. I was very disappointed.
Marco kept on texting me, was there for me and he told me he had feelings for me, also we’ve met various times to have sex. He told me his gf was annoying and stuff like that and he wanted to break up. I didn’t expect anything from him, I didn’t want him to leave his gf for me, for me it was just sex. It was okay for me the way it was. But then 3 weeks ago he told me he was going to tell his gf that he cheated, because it wasn’t fair. So he did and they broke up.
We still texted each other and he wanted to meet me, but we didn’t find the time for a meeting. And then yesterday he texted me, he was back with his gf and that we have to stop our affair.

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I didn’t talk to anybody, because if my best friend found out, that I slept with the bf of her sister, my best friend would hate me and I don’t want to lose her.

Was this a consensual and/or wanted experience for you? For your partner? Yes, I would say we both wanted to have sex.

Do you regret this hookup? If so, why? No, I don’t.

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? How about the WORST? Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? I had great sex with him. 
The worst was the mess of feelings I had in the beginning. I was so stressed because I felt guilty and sad because of my bf.
No, I still have the same opinion.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Somewhat positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Somewhat negative

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