by Eric

Gender: Male
Age: 27
Race/ethnicity: Caucasian
Current location: New York, NY
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
Occupation: Student
Relationship status: Single
Religious affiliation: N/A
How religious are you? Not at all
Sexual orientation: Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 6
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 1

The Quiet Girl

How long ago did this hookup happen? Less than a year ago.

How would you best classify this hookup (e.g., one-night stand, fuck-buddies, friends-with-benefits, booty call, sex with an ex, short fling; paid sex…)? One-night stand

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? Cate was thin, with short brown hair. She looked almost tomboyish. I think the intention was to look business-like and serious. She wore a flannel shirt and jeans and smoked. She was in law school at Columbia University. We had been talking on OKCupid. We met at a bar for our first and only date.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? The hookup began in a place where we were eating french fries in the East Village. We had drank several beers and wanted me to kiss her at the bar, but I decided to wait on it. We sat close to each other while eating our fries and I leaned in closer to her. At some point, we began making out in the restaurant. I felt around the curves of her legs and body and decided that we would head back to her apartment somewhere in this time period. (My apartment was off-limits for reasons that are too boring to go in to).

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We lay on her cot in her tiny, disorganized room. She disrobed and I fingered her through her pink panties. She closed her eyes and breathed in to my ear, but hardly made any pleasurable noises. I took this to mean that she was nervous. I was also a little nervous, but moreover awkward. I got her pants off and pulled off her panties, which had a damp spot on them around the area of her cunt. I began licking her and weaved one hand across her breasts and up to her cheeks. I wanted her to suck on my fingers and she did. She nibbled on them, a little too hard at times. She was very wet and her vagina was very large, but she wasn’t moaning or anything. This only sort of changed during intercourse. I wore a green condom that we got from her drawer–she had a number of color-coded condoms– and moved in and out of her while she curled up in almost a ball. She shut her eyes and moved her legs and arms around and gasped a few times, but I still wondered if she was enjoying it all that much. I came and rolled off her. Later, as we lay in bed in the dark, we started kissing again and fondling each other and she got my boxers off and told me to “make myself comfortable.” She gave me a very long blowjob that never actually resulted in me cumming. I felt bad about it, and really weird. She stopped after it became clear it wasn’t happening and said she wasn’t sure if I was enjoying it. I said it was great and I was sorry I couldn’t get off. We fell asleep.

The next morning, her alarm went off and she rolled over and said good morning. We kissed and I asked her what her opinion was on morning sex. She said she liked it. I rolled on another condom (this one was red) and fucked her again. Initially, we did the same position where she lay on her back, curled up, and I entered her, but I stopped after a minute or two and told her to sit on top of me. She did. She bounced up and down and I made sure to hold eye contact with her the entire time. Her eyes were squinted, her mouth was parted and her face got redder, but she still didn’t make a sound. It was very odd. At one point, I sat up and licked and sucked on her left nipple for a little bit, while she continued to ride me. I came again and this time started laughing as I came. There was something absurd about the sex we were having, I guess.

Did you have an orgasm? Did your partner(s)? I had one orgasm the previous night, another the following morning. I’m not sure about her. Perhaps not.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? Did you discuss STI history? Condoms. We did not discuss STI history.

What were your REASONS for having this hookup? I wanted commitment free sex, no questions asked. I had gotten out of a relationship three months before and this was the first woman I’d been with since that time.

Were alcohol or drugs involved? If so, how much? Several beers. Nothing major.

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it? What are your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? We went out for coffee. We talked. We exchanged e-mails and went our separate ways; she had school, I had work. I reached out to her several times later on to see if she wanted to hang out, but she came up with an excuse both times. I wanted her to be someone who I could casually hook up with and I think she had been through this situation before. I didn’t see her again.

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? Several friends. At first, I told them that I had this girl I was casually seeing because I was that confident about it at first. They were happy for me, but it was nothing major.

Was this a consensual and/or wanted experience for you? For your partner? Yes.

Do you regret this hookup? If so, why? No.

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? How about the WORST? Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? The morning sex was the best part, although I still wonder if it wasn’t great for her. The whole situation made me feel kind of detached and nihilistic. It was almost random and completely meaningless sex for both of us. I think we were both too awkward and detached to think about it any other way. When I consider these facts, I feel somewhat uneasy. I do want the next woman I’m with to be someone who I’m in a relationship with and really connect with.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative

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