What’s your gender? Man
How old are you? 58
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? Europe
What country and/or city do you live in? Cyprus
Highest education received: Post-graduate degree (eg., MA, MS, PhD, JD, MD)
What’s your occupation? Academic
What’s your current relationship status? Single
Religious affiliation: Agnostic
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? >100
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
The Tall Woman
How long ago did this hookup happen? 15 years
What was your relationship status at the time? Dating casually
How would you best classify this hookup? No hookup
How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a week
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I was working (in a very major position which I am not disclosing) at the college which her daughter attended. Twice a year she visited her daughter and we had a chat in my office, sometimes the two of us, sometimes in the presence of the daughter. It was all very formal, until I left that college and she visited me at my new place of work. She invited me out, to thank me, as she said, for caring about her daughter while I was at the college. I must have met with her three or four times before (in my office), but I never noticed how tall she was, how well she carried herself, and how free of blemishes was her face. It would be true to say that, until that night we met at the restaurant she had ivited me, I had not noticed that she was a woman!
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? Although a foreigner in my country, she must have asked around or made a wild and successful guess, because the restaurant we met was one of the best and one of my favourites. We had dinner and she let me choose the wine. She then asked if I wanted to go to a bar for drink, and I took her to a beach-bar where you could take your drink and walk along the beach. We took our shoes off (my suggestion), took a drink in hand and walked. At some point we stopped, looked at the sea and mused about this and that. Then, all of a sudeen, she asked “Don’t you like me as a woman?” to which I answered “Now I do”. Then we kissed for a long time (I don’t remember who initiated it, but I think it was mutual), and petted like school-children. When she put her hand and felt my cock, I broke up the embrace and led her to the car and we silently drove to my place.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? I am not very tall, only 176 cm. I like taller women, particularly their long legs. So, as soon as we entered the house I took has clothes off (and mine) and laid her on the floor. I kissed along her long legs for a long time, and her back, which was also long and endless. At some point I concentrated between her legs and she came loudly in my mouth. Before she finished cumming I entered her and we I thrusted till she came again. I had not come. Then, we moved to the bedroom, on the bed, where we continued for several hours. She came a couple of more times, and then she slept. We did not talk about anything else except what was happening at the time, for example “lick me” and “fuck me harder” and “suck my cock” and this kind of talk. Not too extreme but also not silent. She was nor very active, she was rather on the receiving end, and I was so thrilled with her body that I really did not give her much chance to do anything but accept and enjoy my caresses. I remember that we changed positions many times, but she could not ride me very well, because of her size. We did not do anal, because I did not think about it. (We did the second time we met, after six months.)
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very
Did you have an orgasm? Yes, more than one
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? In the morning she had a huge smile, but she knew I had to go to work and she to prepare for her flight back, so we just kissed and I drove her to the hotel she was staying. She did come back after six months, and although she initially came to visit her daughter, again, she arranged to meet me right after she checked in the hotel and had a coffee with her daughter. She stayed for a week and we met and made love every day. The third time, after another six months, she stayed for several months and again we met and made love every day, although we never talked about a relationship!!! After this third time she did not come back for several years. Her daughter had finished College and they moved back to her country. But maybe seven years after the last time she informed me that she was coming to visit me. She stayed for two weeks, and, again, it was sex every day. We did not have time to talk about much else. After she left she wrote to me that she was in love and she wanted to move where I was and live with me. I politely answered no… after two more years she came, and we went to dinner a few time, but nothing else happened.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) None
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Didn’t want to disappoint my partner, It was easy / convenient
How intoxicated were you? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it
What substances did you consume? Alcohol
How intoxicated was your partner? Small amount of alcohol or drugs, not enough to feel it
What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Somewhat
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I did not talk about this hookup cum relationship to anyone, althout many friends saw us out together and admired her. I think they were guessing we were together, but nobody knew exactly how it happened and how deep it went.
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Somewhat
Do you regret this hookup? A little bit
Why do you regret this hookup? It is very difficult to know that there is a person some thousands of miles away thinking about you, counting the days, weeks, months, years even, till they see you again. I did not realse at the time how depended she would become, although she managed (and still manages) to hide it as best as she could (can). But, there is not “emotionally neutral” way to tell someone “I wanted to have a child with you”. On the other hand, I detest emotionally univolved encounters. I wish there was a middle way…
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? The best thing, of course, is having known this wonderful person and so very attractive woman. Really, no matter how confident one feels about oneself, there is something very satisfying walking next to a nearly 2 metres tall Aphrodite who is crazy about you!
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? One is always asking oneself, I believe, if the prior feeling is enough to make up for the resposnibility one feels for the other person’s emotions. A question that needs another doctoral thesis to be answered, I suppose, so better leave it at that.
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? I became a little more careful, about woman who seem to be ready to get into the deep end of the emotional part right away, or, even, silghtly further down along the way. I must have missed a few good lays because of that, but it does not matter. Better not to feel the weight of the other’s emotional dependence.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Fairly positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Not at all negative
Anything else you want to add about this hookup? Maybe you want to think about this story a little more, so I think I should provide you with some more details. At the time of the story I was 43, now I am 58. She was 36, now, of course, 51. I am, as I said, 176 cm and she is 190 cm.
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? There is no sex without emotional involvement, In this respect, there is no casual sex. The difference is, of course, in the intensity and duration of this involvement. Some people can handle it better than others, but nobody feels nothing. We should consider more the feelings of the partner… etc. etc.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? Part of the new information age.
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