by KT

Gender: Female
Age: 23
Race/ethnicity: Asian
Location: Mumbai, India
Highest education received: College degree (eg., BA, BS)
Occupation: Marketing Manager
Relationship status: Single
Religious affiliation: Spiritual by choice. Hindu by birth.
How religious are you? Somewhat
Sexual orientation: Mostly heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 5
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

The Win-Win Situation

How long ago did this hookup happen? 2 weeks back

How would you best classify this hookup (e.g., one-night stand, fuck-buddies, friends-with-benefits, booty call, sex with an ex, short fling; paid sex…)? Short fling, so far.

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? I met him at my best friend’s birthday party. I’d heard a lot about him but never thought I’d hit it off with him in the first place. Also I had a messy friends-with-benefits history with this best friend for about a year before I told myself I’d had enough. I didn’t speak to him for a couple of months before ending up at his birthday to surprise him.
His friend is pursuing acting, is about 5′ 10″, has a well toned body and a very emotive face. Super smart, very nice haircut and a clean shaven look. Kind eyes. By the time I got to the party, he was pretty drunk. He was busy dancing and making sure everyone did the same. Even in his drunken state, he found an instance to tell me in a very adorable way that he thought I was pretty. He never tried to come on to me. At the same time, he always somehow ended up next to me. I was sober through the whole night. But he was a sight to behold. So funny and charming. We discussed music and he jokingly said he loved me because I loved all of his favorite songs. Somewhere around 4 am, he made an exit because he had promised to drop another friend back home. He left after hugging me goodbye. He swears he gave me a peck on my neck but I was too damn happy to notice, I guess.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? The next day, after chatting about the party, I remembered that he had clicked a couple of pictures of us together last night and i wanted to see them. So I asked my best friend to ask him to send me the pictures. He mailed them to me. We started chatting on mail first, then Facebook. By the end of the night, we were on Whatsapp. He made it clear that he found me attractive. I was superbly impressed that despite being so drunk, he had the good judgement to follow through later and not creep me out last night. That’s secondary to the fact that I thought he was easily the best looking guy I’d met personally. Given my Indian genes, I’m definitely curvy but I am really fair and taller than average. And here he was, an MBA grad pursuing acting. My best friend despite knowing me for such a long time, didn’t think even remotely that we would hit it off so well. The chatting continued for the next couple of days. Things got pretty intense on text itself. We both knew we were purely attracted to each other and couldn’t afford to let things become emotional for the time being. We joked about how things were perfect and it was win-win situation for both of us. I finally landed up at his place 4 days later. We were texting till about 2 mins before entering his house. The build up was pretty intense.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? Did you have an orgasm? Did your partner(s)? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We thought we wouldn’t make it past his front door. But he opened the door and we feigned normality for a few minutes. Then he took me in his arms and we breathed each other in. We had discussed our preferences but I wore a perfume other than the ones he mentioned. He loved it nonetheless. The first kiss was slow and unhurried. We landed up on the couch, me in his lap. We made out a bit more. Then to my surprise, he picked me up! Now mind you, I’m quite on the heavy side so I’ve never been picked up in the past though I’ve always had the fantasy of being taken against a wall. I was so shocked and the next thing I knew, he had carried me into his bedroom, thrown me onto the bed and we were undressing each other frantically. He loves to bite. Has a fetish for biting the soft spot on the upper arm where the shoulder ends. And he genuinely loved my curves. Which just made me all the more comfortable. We were at it like rabbits for about 5 hours. He came thrice. I have a problem with coming, I think. But if shaking thighs are a sign, I was unable to walk properly till the next morning. He asked me about it and I told him he was doing everything right and that all my moans were very much real.  It was easily the most intense experience we both had been through. We didn’t venture into anything anal.

Somewhere in the last hour, we just lied around naked under a blanket, talking and eating and caressing each other. The setting was so comfortable. I started to dress while talking to him and he got up and pulled me close and said he didn’t like the idea of me dressing up and leaving. Next thing, we were at it again. This time when he entered me, I was so tight that my face turned blue from all the blood rushing due to arousal. It was a quickie and we ended up spent in each other’s arms with soft kisses. On text, he said he would kiss me till my lips popped like a bottle of champagne and turned more pink than my cheeks. When I left his place, I had a massive hickey on my left arm and lips that had bled a little and were practically purple. I wished I didn’t have to leave because his bed was too damn cozy. But I knew if i stayed, I wouldn’t end up sleeping anyway.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? Did you discuss STI history? We used condoms. When my lips bled, I immediately cleaned them up because it was barely a couple of drops. But we stuck to not kissing for an hour or so. Post that, the wound healed and we avoided biting but kissed a lot nonetheless. We didn’t discuss STI histories. But we both knew it had been a while since our last time. I am very particular about my hygiene and so is he.

What were your REASONS for having this hookup? Purely attraction. I’ve been wanting an arrangement like this for a year now. But it didn’t work out with my friend. I needed something where we physically satisfied each other but got along well too. Because good conversation is very important to me. On a lot of topics, we were on the same page and for the rest, we never pushed each other. It was a win-win situation for both of us because he found my sense of humor and intellect quite attractive.

Were alcohol or drugs involved? If so, how much? None. In fact, in the middle of it all, he got so drained that we took a break and shared a chocolate protein shake and a large bar of chocolate while laughing about it.

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it? What are your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I got back home. The next day he insisted that I come to see him again. But it just wasn’t possible to travel to his side of town till next week. There wasn’t any intention to keep him waiting on purpose. I was supposed to start working the next week onwards and my office is a 15 min ride from his place. We figured we would work out the arrangement easily. But the day after him insisting, things kinda cooled off from his end because I think he was taken aback by how much he wanted me. He said maybe we should cool off for a bit. I agreed because I really wanted this arrangement to work and was willing to wait for it. We didn’t talk for the next 4-5 days. When I joined work, I texted him in the morning because I had left my earrings at his place the last time and I owed him some cash too. Somehow, things didn’t work out. He left for his hometown the next  day and only got back the day before. We have been trying to meet but it doesn’t work out. He always tries to set the meeting outside. I asked him straight up if he had cooled off for good because I’d rather have the honesty now than disappointment later. He said he needed to focus on certain things right now but really wanted to get back to what I was offering at a later stage. Whenever we text, 8 out of 10 times, it’s me first. We barely flirt. I even told him that if he didn’t like the idea of me coming over, I wouldn’t. I’m really not interested in making him uncomfortable. I think we might meet tomorrow. The whole point of trying this was to not face disappointment. But I think I am. My new job takes up too much of my time. All I want is a companion who doesn’t expect me to show up all dolled up at dinner later and discuss inconsequential things. I’ve been trying to make things easier for him and giving him space. But I don’t see him doing the same and it’s making me feel like a doormat. I feel like I might be over it when he gets back even though I really want this to work out.

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I spoke about it with 3 of my friends and a cousin. One of them is the best friend who has been warning me the whole time that this guy is quite flippant and can switch off anytime. I haven’t discussed everything with him given our history and because he is also his best friend. But I know what we had that day was rare to come by again. And we both know it. My judgement is at a crossroads right now. But my common sense tells me it’s done for good and I should move on.

Was this a consensual and/or wanted experience for you? For your partner? Definitely consensual.

Do you regret this hookup? If so, why? I don’t. It was great while it lasted.

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? How about the WORST? Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? The best things were the comfort level and the intensity. It was so uninhibited. The fact that someone like him could be into someone like me just boosted my confidence like crazy. I think I’ve become all the more comfortable with my curves after this experience. 
The worst thing was his withdrawal after things were going so well. He had warned me that patience wasn’t his forte. But I thought that day was good enough to overcome that hurdle. Now I’m not too sure.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative

Anything else you want to add about this hookup or anything else? I think in an Indian Society, it’s fairly difficult to imagine that women like me exist. But I know a lot of women are slowly realising it isn’t worth wasting time pursuing relationships unless things are very certain to turn out well. But simultaneously, we don’t want to deny ourselves the physical satisfaction. With each passing day, I find more women who know exactly what they want and aren’t afraid to let you know about it.

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