What’s your gender? Genderqueer / Nonbinary
How old are you? 19
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? USA
Highest education received: Some college (currently in college)
What’s your occupation? Fast food worker
What’s your current relationship status? Single
Religious affiliation: Wiccan / Pagan
How religious are you? A little
What’s your sexual orientation? Bisexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? 4
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 1

Thoroughly Disappointed

How long ago did this hookup happen? Today

What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status

How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand

How long did you know the person before this hookup? For less than a week

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He was 19, black, kinda chubby but still muscular (typical football build), about 6′. I met him on tinder and we exchanged numbers and made plans to get coffee. Then, we spontaneously changed plans to walking around his neighborhood. Honestly, I was more attracted to him in the profile pics than in real life. Still, I thought I might want to have sex with him.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? After it got hot outside we went to his house, basically knowing what was happening. We lounged on his bed for a while before he initiated kissing.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? We started kissing, and I got half naked before I realized I just wasn’t getting turned on at all. I was more concerned about errands and what I wanted for lunch. He had a rock hard erection though, so I felt kinda bad. I apologized and said I wasn’t feeling it, but he talked me into helping him get off before I left. I figured I’d give him a pity hand job and take off, but he took /forever/ and kept trying to initiate contact with me. I caved and let him finger me even though I was still really bored. His technique was rough and bad. Eventually, he got to a place where it was kind of pleasant and I was super ready to leave so I told him to put on a condom and hop on. The sex was pretty boring and he finally came a few minutes later. I wish he had kept the condom on instead of cumming on my stomach though.

How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Not at all

Did you have an orgasm? No, not even close

Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, one

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I blocked his number and don’t intend to hang out with him again, although he said he’d like to get lunch sometime.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Withdrawal, Condoms, Discussed STI testing history

What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Didn’t want to disappoint my partner, Boredom, Just happened, I don’t know why, just went along with it

How intoxicated were you? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How intoxicated was your partner? Not at all (no alcohol or drugs)

How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? A little bit

Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I didn’t give a clear ‘yes’, but I didn’t give a ‘no’

How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very

Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? Two friends, one of whom was checking in on me to make sure I was still safe. They were happy I was getting back out there but disappointed that the sex was so bad.

How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Neutral

Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all

Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? I don’t know / I’m not sure

Do you regret this hookup? A little bit

Why do you regret this hookup? TBH it was just a waste of my time

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? It was nice to know I’m over my ex enough to have sex with someone else

What was the WORST thing about this hookup? This guy was kind of douchey and didn’t know when to just quit. Also he fingers like a jackhammer.

Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? Not really.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? A little positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Somewhat negative

What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? I wish sexual health was something people took more seriously, and that testing and talking about contraception were easier conversations.

You have a hookup story to share? Submit it here!