What’s your gender? Woman
How old are you? 29
What’s your race/ethnicity? White / Caucasian
What continent do you live on? North America
What country and/or city do you live in? Kansas City
Highest education received: Some college (not currently in college)
What’s your occupation? Library assistant
What’s your current relationship status? Divorce date in one month
Religious affiliation: Agnostic
How religious are you? Not at all
What’s your sexual orientation? Heterosexual
How many sexual partners have you had in your life (including oral sex)? No idea
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0
How long ago did this hookup happen? Less than 24 hours ago
What was your relationship status at the time? Same as current status
How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand
How long did you know the person before this hookup? Just met that day
Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He was as attractive as his tinder photos, immigrant to United States when he was a kid, had no accent, very polite. Met him at a bar after messaging back and forth about possibly meeting up. I had just met him for the first time that night.
How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? We had a few drinks at a bar down the street from my apartment, I walked and met him, he paid for the drinks, then we went to a jazz club for a couple of martinis. After leaving the jazz club, the hook up began with him driving me to his place about 10 minutes from mine after we left the bar. We did some recreational drugs and started to kiss, he instigated I believe.
What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? He fingered me, wasn’t very good at it, seemed to lack confidence/experience. I felt great during the vaginal and anal sex though, I was loosened up enough thanks to the foreplay and drugs, that I was able to relax a bit. He never had me be on top, which I thought was strange. He came quite a few times, and we had many different rounds of sex spaced out all night/morning. Each time he came, he would pull out of my vagina and then insert himself into my anus and cum inside, the first time he asked if it was okay to do so, the rest of the times he didn’t. Right before he took me home, we attempted to have sex again, he tried to slip his penis into my ass without asking me, I had to move and get him out after I made a sound signaling that it was uncomfortable. It was never awkward, and we cuddled while we slept. It was quite nice.
How sexually satisfying was this hookup? Very
Did you have an orgasm? No, but I was close
Did your partner have an orgasm? Yes, multiple
What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it the next day? What are/were your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? I don’t want a future with this person. I would prefer someone who wasn’t so into anal like he was, made me question his sexuality, which sounds bad. He is also moving to Colorado at the end of this month (Sept). I feel like I know him better now since we met on tinder and had never met prior. I will not care if I do not see this person again.
What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? (Check all that apply) Withdrawal
What were your motives for this hookup? Fun, pleasure, horniness, Attraction to partner(s), Boredom, It was easy / convenient
How intoxicated were you? A little tipsy/high
What substances did you consume? Alcohol, Marijuana, hashish, Cocaine, Hallucinogens (LSD, mushrooms, DMT…)
How intoxicated was your partner? Drunk/high but not wasted
What substances did your partner(s) consume? Alcohol, Marijuana, hashish, Hallucinogens (LSD, mushrooms, DMT…)
How wanted was this hookup for you at the time? Somewhat
Did you consent to this hookup at the time? I gave enthusiastic consent
How wanted was this hookup for your partner at the time? Very
Did your partner(s) consent to this hookup? They gave enthusiastic consent
To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? No one
How would you best summarize people’s reactions about this hookup? Neutral
Did you get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Did your partner get emotionally hurt as a result of this hookup? Not at all
Do you regret this hookup? Not at all
What was the BEST thing about this hookup? How sexually free I felt, how it was a real moment, not awkward one bit.
What was the WORST thing about this hookup? Not using condoms, worrying about STIs
Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? This wasn’t my first one night stand, but one of few when I wasn’t that messed up on substances, I recall every moment and love how relaxed it all was.
All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Very positive
All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? A little negative
What are your thoughts on casual sex more generally, the role it has played in your life, and/or its role in society? What would you like to see changed in that regard? safe sex is key, but I have been having casual sex since I first started having sex 12 years ago, and love it. I love feeling wanted. I don’t think there is anything wrong with casual hookups, as long as both parties are clear about what they are looking for romantically, and be safe about it.
What do you think about the Casual Sex Project? I don’t know much about it, so I’m looking forward to figuring out more about it.
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