by Alison
Gender: Female

Age: 21
Race/ethnicity: Caucasian
Location: Michigan
Highest education received: Some college (currently in college)
Occupation: Student
Religious affiliation: None
How religious are you? Not at all
Sexual orientation: Heterosexual
How many hookup stories have you here posted before? 0

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Why You Should Never Pick the Hottest Guy at the Party

How long ago did this hookup happen? A year ago

How would you best classify this hookup? One-night stand

Tell us about your PARTNER(S). What did they look like? How well did you know them, had you hooked up before? How/Where did you meet them? How did you feel about them before the hookup? He was tall. So tall. He had a strong jaw and beautiful blue eyes. His muscles were chiseled and defined. I had never met him before that night. I walked into my neighbor’s birthday party and he was there across the room. We made eye contact right before my neighbor scooped me up off the ground for a huge birthday hug. After wishing a happy birthday to my friend, I walked over to the beer pong table. My friend Abby was playing and she asked me to be her partner for the next round. Well guess who we were playing? Yes, Mr. beautiful himself.

How/where did the hookup BEGIN? What led to it? Was planning involved? Who instigated it? I’ve always been told I was beautiful but I’ve always been modest about it. I play coy when I flirt and try to let my personality outshine the way I look. It didn’t take long before my competitive nature and superior pong skills gave Mr. Beautiful the opportunity to flirt. We flirted all night. We were the last two awake and he asked if I wanted to cuddle. I was tired and accepted the invitation.

What happened DURING the hookup? What sexual behaviors took place (e.g., oral, vaginal, anal, kinky stuff)? How did you feel during it? Did you have an orgasm? Did your partner(s)? How did they behave toward you? Were they a good lover? What did you talk about? How did it end? At first we just laid in bed  wrapped in each other’s arms and then he kissed me gently on the forehead, then my cheek and then planted a kiss on my lips. We just melted together after that. The sex wasn’t bad – decent length. When we were done he said, “Wow. All I wanted was a kiss.”
Then it hit me. Feelings of regret, disgust, disappointment in myself. I had never hooked up like that before. And now I was laying there next to some guy I barely knew who managed to make me feel even worse about what had just happened than I already had.

What precautions did you take to prevent STIs and pregnancy? Did you discuss STI history? He wore a condom and I was on birth control but we didn’t talk about STIs.

What were your REASONS for having this hookup? There was no reason. I walked in and the hottest guy in the room wanted my attention. I felt amazing. Like I was on top of the world. Too bad that feeling didn’t last.

Were alcohol or drugs involved? If so, how much? We had both been drinking but were up talking for a couple of hours and most of the affects had worn off.

What happened AFTER the hookup? How did you feel about it? What are your expectations/hopes for the future with this person? How do you feel about them now? We got breakfast with my neighbor and Abby the next morning. It was awkward and I was feeling really down about what I had done. The worst part was that a month or so later at another party I ran into him again. He kept hinting that he wanted a repeat of last time, but I held out. He cornered me in my friends room where I had my purse and coat. He was drunk and tried to hug me. I pushed him off but he kept grabbing at me. He started unzipping his pants and said, “come here baby just show me that you’re interested.” I pushed him off me and asked him who he thought he was and his response was, “Didn’t take much to get you before. Whatever, your friend Ashley is pretty hot.” And he walked out of the room. I just sunk down on the bed and cried. What had I done? Why did I let myself hook up with someone I hardly knew?

To whom did you talk about the hookup? How did they react? I didn’t talk about it at all. When people asked I just shut them down or changed the subject. Especially after he basically sexually assaulted me. I felt like it was my fault and I didn’t want anyone else to know or to judge me.

Was this a consensual and/or wanted experience for you? For your partner? It was consensual for both parties.

Do you regret this hookup? If so, why? I regret this hook up because sex is so intimate. Since then, I have had a relationship with the most caring, genuine man I’ve ever met and we haven’t had sex, but our relationship is the most intimate I’ve had. When we do have sex he won’t make me feel dirty or disgusted with myself. Sex should be about the connection, not the momentary satisfaction because it fades quickly and morphs into regret.

What was the BEST thing about this hookup? How about the WORST? Has this hookup changed the way you think about casual sex, sexuality, or yourself in general? The best thing was the lesson I learned. The worst was the aftermath.
My views on casual sex have changed. Even when it seems like it’s casual sex, it’s not. You’re connecting with another person in the most intimate way and it should be beautiful. You shouldn’t feel dirty or disappointed afterward.

All things considered, how POSITIVE was this experience? Not at all positive

All things considered, how NEGATIVE was this experience? Very negative

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